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Investing in girls has shown to be a worthy investment, one that impacts generations. An educated girl someday becomes an educated woman who can find meaningful employment, she will take care of her needs, those of her family and in one way of or the other, find ways to pay it forward to her community. Here are ways you can invest in girls.
Over the years, I have calculatedly taken lots of risks and put myself out there, but sometimes I wonder if I am taking enough risks. For instance, before I can get into any business dealings, I would say I exercise a little bit more caution than the average person. I sometimes wonder if this might have held me back from pursuing certain opportunities. From a personal perspective, I do feel like men do take far bigger risks. I might be wrong or even biased with this take. I have had conversations about risks with my girlies and we all agree the reason it might seem that men might take bigger or more risks could be associated with the level of audacity they have in pursuing the things they want.
I have experienced first-hand how poverty can define the path for an individual, from the type of education they have access to, the type of opportunities, their standard of living and even access to some of the most basic things such as food, water, shelter and clothing. According to the World Bank “around 700 million people live on less than $2.15 per day, the extreme poverty line. Extreme poverty remains concentrated in parts of Sub-Saharan Africa, fragile and conflict-affected areas, and rural areas.” Access to opportunities I began working with communities immediately after university. The first non-profit I worked with granted me the opportunity to work with amazing girls rescued from early marriage and FGM in West Pokot Kenya. This experience was one for the books and one that shaped my desire to play a small part in creating opportunities for others. While working here, I was faced with the realities that the larger community was facing, access to drinking water was an issue for most of the community members and they would have to walk long distances to access a basic need. You can imagine the education situation. In comparison to other locations in Kenya, where you can find schools near each other, you could travel several kilometers here before locating one. The standards of living were the most basic for most households and coming from a place where I had access to most of these things without a struggle, I could only be grateful for the opportunities I had. The program we were running here was a skills training program for girls rescued from early marriages and FGM. It was also a sponsored program that only hosted 100 girls meaning that there were a lot more girls and young people who did not have access to these types of opportunities. When I started working in Kakamega, I also saw how poverty alienated children from accessing opportunities. The program I was working on with LatitudeZero Opportunities was also fully funded. We held workshops at the orphanage we were working at. Kids from the larger community had access to this home and would occasionally show up. They showed lots of interest in our programs, our resources, however, were stretched and it was hard to accommodate each of them. Throughout our time at this place, some of them who were consistent got a few lessons from my designated assistant facilitators, I would often catch them admiring the things they made while others learnt how to use computers for the first time. In the future, I hope to get to a place where I can easily provide these services to more kids and young people for free. Growing up, I remember going to school without a proper school bag and shoes. I would do most of my homework during the breaks between the class sessions. This was because we did not have electricity at home and by 8 P.M, my mum would ask us to go to bed so we could save on paraffin for the next day. By the time I was in eighth grade, I would wake up by 5:30 A.M, shower, and head to school. By 6:15 AM, I would be seated in class doing some extra reading because there was electricity in our classes. I was always first to arrive in our class and by the time other students arrived, I had done so much. Let’s just say I excelled while at it and was always the best student in our class. My biggest wish as a kid growing up was that some of these basic needs would have been accessible. I learnt however to make do with what was available. Call me a survivor if you will. I learnt from a young age that I needed to work twice as hard. In grade 5, I vividly remember one of my teachers who used to give me extra English lessons, she told me these exact words “Elenah, you have to work extra hard, you are the hope of your family.” She saw something in me, a potential I had not unlocked or even thought of. These words pushed me out of my comfort zone. These words have echoed over the years and reminded me that I was meant for greatness. Her encouragement played a big role in my securing a fully sponsored high school education at a prestigious national school. Had it not been for such an opportunity, maybe I would not have gotten the opportunities that followed. Untapped potential A lot of children and young people have been locked out from accessing educational opportunities, employment opportunities and the ability to have their voices heard because of their backgrounds. For some children, they have never seen the four corners of a classroom or a teacher to remind them of their potential. These kids will never know how much they could have changed the little corner of their world. They never get to unlock their dreams and the depth of what could have been. For the young people locked out of accessing relevant education, skills training and employment opportunities, they may never fully be able to live to their full potential, live fulfilling lives where they can fend for themselves, and their families and even contribute to the economic growth of communities they come from. In my line of work, I have come across different organizations trying to address these issues. I have seen children and young people accessing opportunities they wouldn’t have had access to, due to these efforts. It warms my heart to see the change, experience the change and be part of the change. However, a lot more needs to be done to change these narratives. The need for all stakeholders to work together to address these issues is more important now, especially for concerned governments. The impact of aid in poverty alienation. Humanitarian aid has been key in enabling last mile communities’ access educational, economic, health and other opportunities. With the recent closure of
Take it slow. Sometimes the world moves a little bit fast than we can keep up. We are often caught up in the chaos this presents. It easy to even feel suffocated. Like we cannot make it to the next step of it all. Those times, we are drained, we do not have strength to keep going and it feels like we have come to the end of the party. We are done! For some, we go one our knees and pray to whichever God we believe in, we pray that he could remove the hurdles we face from our path. We ask him endless questions, like if things will ever be alright and if finally, we can figure it out. We ask for lots of favors and hope our faith can carry us through. For some, we drench ourselves in alcohol and anything that can give us a high. We are looking for those moments that we truly believe that we can forget our problems even if for a minute. So, we go out for most of the night and only catch some sleep in the wee hours of the morning. And when we awake, we try to find ways to sober up so we could show up to those jobs or social events at least not looking wasted, hangover, hopeless and like our problems. For some, we will wear our makeup to hide that inflamed cheek, we fell from our stupor the last night, so we hope the shade of makeup we have can cover it up. For others, we will wear our favorite sunglasses to hide that inflamed eye. “They cannot find out,” we tell ourselves but deep down we long to be saved. This state is our cry for help, we have been going about it for a couple of months and no one noticed. It seems we know how to hide it so well, but maybe sooner somebody will catch up. For some, we become shopaholics, from the latest style of clothing in the most expensive shops, to the most expensive shoes, liquor and anything that tickles our fancy. We watch as our bank balance reflects a negative, that saving account that we took so long to fatten, we watch as the proof of funds disappears. We dig our own hole, we forget those dreams we always had, like having an emergency fund, or those vacations we have saved our last coins for, that trip to Maldives and Paris. Now a dream that we may never realize. So, we become our own horror story. We pen every word of it. We become our own nightmare. And on bad days, we question our very existence. We wonder why, why misfortune chose us. And when our family and friends call us to inform us of their recent success, we loathe them for it and eventually we stop picking their calls. Like why would they be doing better than we are? We brand them God’s favorite, they must be, there could be no possible explanation as to why they could be doing so well yet we are deep in our struggles. We pray and hope somebody could pick us up from this rut or at least we can figure it out. But we do not have even the will. Our hearts are overwhelmed, our pillows become our comfort, and we hope to find ourselves, maybe someday we will. When we hit rock bottom. We ask the universe for a sign, we wish and long for one. Then one day, when all stopped working and we couldn’t even find the strength to take a shower, we reflect on what our life has become. We wake up one day and decide we have had enough, somehow, we find the strength to hit the bathroom, after months. The water hits different, it feels like our pain is being washed away. We stand still and allow ourselves to be in the moment. We allow the warmth of this water and this moment to reassure us. Everything is gonna be alright, it feels like our energy is renewed once again. After an hour of being in this shower, we get out and call our best friend and when they pick up we utter “I need help, I cannot do this by myself” then we sigh in relief, the weight in our shoulders has disappeared after we heard them say they have our back. And when we meet them later that day, they reassure us that they always got us. That we only needed to ask and be ready to receive the help, that its okay, it will be okay as long as we take it slow, believe and trust in the process. We sip down that coffee and look back at how tough the last couple months have been and how much we lost. But it’s okay, it’s going to be okay after all. Self-care and healing. We sign up for those dance lessons we always wanted to give a shot, we sign up for those swimming lessons and skating classes. We fill our weekends with laughter by hanging out with family and friends. Gradually, our lives come back to some level of normalcy, we are acing this. Tough times do not last! When we are fully okay, we find ways to share our light with those who need it. We share our vulnerability. We are not afraid of admitting that there are times things get a bit tough and its okay to lean on a community.
My journey to finding my voice has been one long one that took self-belief, other people believing in me and lots of taking leaps of faith and being consistent. I am grateful that as a young girl I always dreamed and pushed for those dreams. Finding my voice required me to push away self-limiting beliefs and dig deeper.
When the year started, I thought I knew what I wanted and even planned around it. I had a wish list of the things I wanted to do and achieve. New year resolutions as some of you refer to it. I am an ambitious person, and sometimes I set ambitious goals, but for this year, I was a bit realistic with what I wanted, mostly just peace and some levelling up in my self-actualization journey. Little did I know that sometimes we can make plans and God laughs at us. I however still recommend that we make plans and bring them to his attention, you know like the way you tell him the desires of your heart through a prayer. Exactly that. The first three months of the year flew by. In January, I spent time working with Waweza Kids making exquisite jewellery for their project. It was an amazing experience. I however cannot recall how February and March ended; they were almost uneventful I almost forgot about them. But it was in how they flew by, within no time, the first quarter of the year was almost coming to an end. And the other quarters have flown by so quickly, but the lesson that has remained constant has been that “a lot can happen in a year”. Choose yourself. Last year, I had this lingering feeling that I needed to change my environment, I had stagnated in an environment that was not allowing me growth or even room to think about the growth I needed to shift my life. I was drained and had kinda lost myself pursuing things that were not meant for me. And I was taking too long to come to terms with this reality. A reality that would have set me on the straight and narrow path, now that I think of it; I would encourage anyone out here who is feeling stuck, to choose yourself, choose a different environment, choose a job that works for you, or choose the relationships that suit you. Whatever it is, at an individual level, all the change begins, and it starts with us choosing and prioritizing ourselves. Embracing change. Has something ever happened to you that pushed you out of your comfort zone? When that defining moment hits you and you must make a change? I experienced this, this year after procrastinating about my move last year. I was served a reality check on not so much of a silver platter, it was like being thrown to the deep end of a swimming pool when you are just a beginner. Change as they say is inevitable, my moving from Nakuru to Nairobi was not on my bingo cards. I was tired of Nakuru but hadn’t planned for Nairobi. It came as a surprise but it has been the best thing that happened to me this year. It set a lot of things in motion, and I am not complaining. My move came with a lot of discomfort and self-discovery. I learnt what it takes to be alone, in my thoughts and leading my own little life tucked somewhere away from all the noise that had surrounded my life for the longest. I spent my first two months crocheting in the evening and finding ways to elevate my vibrations. My energy was finding me. My best friend had bought me a journal which as I write this is full. The first time this has happened in years. I never fill my journal to the last page. I guess I had a lot to tell my journal, it helped me come back to myself. You know that time you pour your heart out uncensored? That has been my experience with journaling this year. I have loved every minute of it. I highly recommend picking this as a habit. New habits When I was making my move, I made a conscious decision to do more for myself. I listed down aspects of my life that I wanted to focus on. Physical fitness was on top of the list. In June, I started taking evening walks that I enjoyed, I was however a little bit inconsistent. A friend of mine proposed we sync our walking schedule, and we did. We have been consistent since then, walking between 10K-15K steps a day, initially for five days a week and now for four days a week. I would never have thought this possible. If you ask me the secret, I will say the willpower to change something, being consistent and having an accountability partner. I have exceeded my expectations, and I am so proud of how far I have come. I am snatched, as they say, that’s how I can summarise what my physical appearance looks like. I was lucky enough to have another friend of mine help me form the habit of waking up early in the morning. I had always been a night owl, I would sleep at 3Am and wake up by 9AM. I started sleeping between 11PM-12AM and waking up at 6AM a habit I had not thought possible for more than 5 years. This was a huge milestone. I am grateful for the sacrifice they made to help me form this habit. Rediscovering new passions. I have worked from home for the longest period, and I was almost sabotaging my social life. I enjoy being outdoors, the sun on my face, trying and experiencing new cuisines and meeting new people. But I was not doing most of this. I had become an antisocial person and spent most of my time behind my computer working and working. Finally, I became dull Jill. Moving allowed me to try new things, and my best friend has been at the centre of it all. We have explored different spaces and been a bit more intentional. I hope I get to do this more. I am a child of the universe, and I believe the earth is for us to discover, so I
My mother has always been the biggest support system I have had since I was a child. Looking back, she supported my dreams and pushed me to achieve a level of greatness I would not think possible. At an early age of 10, I discovered I had a talent, poetry-I began my journey of doing solo verses. I attended music festivals and the annual church festivals. I vividly remember my first shot at doing a solo piece, it was grueling. My teachers came up with the piece, it was for a church festival. It went like “Food is little, Children are crying, No mothers to nurse them, Fathers, brothers, No men in the villages, All are gone, Gone for days without an end. Fire! Fire! Houses are on fire! What has caused it? We wonder! They came at night, We were to tired to wake up, They stole our food from the stores, They have burnt everything! We carried our belongings, Running for our dear lives, With nowhere to go……” Sadly, this poem was a traumatic one for me, but I was so young to understand. I do not recall the intention behind this poem, or why I was chosen to actually do the solo. But what I do recall was the fact that during practice sessions, one of my teachers asked me to tap into my pain, so I could show emotion and cry. Sadly, for me, this had been my reality, my family and I had lost everything a year before from tribal clashes including my father. Story for another day. As sad as this may seem, that’s how my poetic journey began. Every year, my mum made sure I was in a school play or doing some sort of poetry, I came to love it. She constantly reminded me that I could be anything, that I just needed to put in effort. She would use me as an example for my siblings and somehow, this pushed me to achieve even more in my academics and co-curricular activities. My other siblings also followed this dream, we were an artistic family, we would get all the leading roles in a drama or do solo verses ,both for the church festivals and the Kenyan music festivals for our schools. My mother instilled leadership in us at a very young age. We took up space wherever we were. From learning how to do chores and run our little lives, to learning the importance of farmwork, to being leaders at school and at church. I remember one time my mum being summoned by the church leadership about our whereabouts on a particular Sunday, we had skipped church. This was because we would always lead the church school choir and our missing in action was such a big deal. The world has always been my stage, and my mother made sure that I knew this from a young age. Her support meant everything and propelled me. As a mentor and trainer with LatitudeZero Opportunities , I realise the impact one can have on those who look up to them. How words of affirmation and encouragement can shape the future of the young people I work with. Each day, I strive to let them know that the world is their stage, and they can be anything they ever dreamt of.
There are days I have questioned my very mere existence, sort of like the “why am I here? What was I placed to do on this earth. I have had people joke and even call others “waste of space” very derogatory if you ask me. I don’t believe anyone can be a waste of space. We all serve a calling, yet sometimes I have found myself questioning mine. Wondering if what I am doing is right or enough, or even what legacy I would leave when I am long gone. I asked a few friends of mine if they believed in a purpose and if they found theirs, and if it was fulfilling for them? I got all manner of answers. They all circled back to one thing though, they all wanted in their own way to leave an indelible mark on this world. They wanted to be remembered for their small contribution they had on this world. That’s what I thought summarized purposeful living. Does purpose change? There were times I would have sworn that I knew what my purpose was, and I stuck with it for years. And when something altered this sense of purpose, I found myself lost and questioning what my purpose was. Showing up for your purpose. In 2022, I went through such a phase. I prefer to say I was adjusting and realigning. It was the first time I was going through such a transition, and it shook me like a tsunami. I had lost my voice, not literally but in so many other ways. I thought I had lost my purpose too. Ever been in dark space, a pit you know not how you would get yourself out? That was me in the depths of it all. The struggle was real. I listened to podcasts that would help me find myself. I wanted to rebuild so bad but had little strength to do it. What’s my purpose? Was a question that lingered on at this point. Purposeful living. Purposeful living is a conscious decision to do things in a way that aligns with your core beliefs and values and in a way that makes you happy. My experiences have taught me that purpose doesn’t necessarily remain constant. It is more of that thing that gives you the energy to wake up each day excited to get something done and achieve something. For instance, a new parent may find a new purpose when their child is born, it could be in nurturing their children or working to ensure they don’t miss out on anything. A poet may find new purpose in creating pieces that speak for a social cause and a sign language teacher may find it exciting to teach a class sign language and ensure smooth communication. Find your purpose. When we go through a rough patch, it’s easy to not find anything exciting. We mostly are hanging on by a thread and days and months could go by. It’s okay to stop and take a break and heal us before we can get on track. Self-care is a big part of purposeful living. What’s that thing that gives you purpose?
I have felt lost in my life and sometimes thought of myself as a wandering spirit of some sort. I lost myself in my work when I gave it my all thinking I could change a little corner of my world. I lost myself trying to help other people I cared about because I always went the extra mile to fulfil their needs. You know those times you stretch yourself thin thinking you could do it all, you could take care of all the problems around you, you could take away the pain of those you love and care for deeply. And then one day you wake to realize that that would be such an impossible task. That all along you couldn’t and might never be able to do it all, that you cannot save everyone! In my twenties, I had this noble idea that I could change a lot. I had equal drive and passion, and I constantly was in a race against time, resources and my dreams. I wanted it all, I wanted the world, and nothing could stop me. I remember when I got my very first job, I was a program assistant earning Ksh 20K, it was as if my world had come to a stand still when I got this news. I remember making plans for all the things I could change and budgeting a trip around the “sun”. I thought this money would be life changing and that I could do anything. I had learnt some budgeting during my college years but when I received my very first paycheck, it dawned on me how much responsibility I had vis a vis the money I was earning. It became apparent that I could only do so much. After all the budgeting, I would be left with 2K which I would save in the same current account. Money that would mostly spend very limited time in my account despite it being allocated as “savings”. Why, you might ask, I have always been a giver, so I gave and catered for peoples’ urgent needs. Their emergencies became my own, I embraced them like that scar you got as a kid that isn’t going anywhere. I guess we all have that, right? When I first started my business, I had big dreams. I saw it as my baby, something that needed to be nurtured. So, I drove all my attention there, I spent nights working on putting together workshop materials and thinking about the next big thing. It was such a rollercoaster. I never knew just how much potential this business had, but I had a dream and a clue on how life changing this could be for me and our beneficiaries. I still wanted to change the world, if only I could empower one young mind, if only I could bring about a mindset shift, if only one or two people got employed or started a business because of a skill I had taught them. That was all that I needed. So, I pushed to make it happen, I wouldn’t let anyone get in the way. At some point, I did not realize just how much I was losing myself in my work. I stressed about my deliverables, employee’s deliverables, the participants and whether we were doing enough or right by our funders. I was and still am a perfectionist, but if anything, life has taught me that sometimes we can only do so much. I remember one time just before covid and six months into the business, I broke down. I was overwhelmed and at this point, I just felt like I needed the world to open and swallow me. I thought I should quit but something was still holding me back. It felt like I had not fulfilled my purpose, like there was more to be done and God had placed me here for this very reason. So, I found strength to continue but still I was not taking care of myself. My work became my identity, I was always looking for ways to better our curriculums or learn something I could teach my students. I had fun on most occasions but eventually, that was all I could speak about or identify with. I am a lover; I love life and I love my family and friends. I had never thought that I would let a relationship almost define my very existence. I met a guy; one I thought was the “one”. I guess sometimes we have that kind of person. The one who sweeps you off your feet and it feels like you have conquered the world. Sorry, sometimes it’s just an illusion. I watched a video sometime back that said that “ if he gives you the butterflies” he is not the one. I cannot attest to whether it works that way, but maybe there is some truth to it. The butterflies could be an indicator of being unsettled, some anxiety, like when you go on stage to present a speech or recite a poem and cannot imagine how your audience will react to your delivery. I loved and planned. I thought about all the things we could achieve. Don’t mind me. I am big on planning. My life since I was a teenager has been one big grand plan in my head, did it work the same way I planned it? Sorry to disappoint, it didn’t, but that doesn’t stop me from planning. I still have found myself planning for almost every aspect of my life. It has kinda helped me control some things for sure and anticipate for the worst. Might work for you or not. I lost myself in loving genuinely and even when the red flags about my relationship were right there, served on a silver platter right before me, I couldn’t see them, or maybe I ignored them because I couldn’t bring myself to believe the truth that was right there. It was not working, but
